Sometimes I wonder how “National Whatever Days” get started.
Does somebody just tweet, “Tomorrow is National Fist-Bump a Ginger Day!” and next thing you know, you’re walking down the street with your red-headed step-child, when a stranger crouches down in front of him and yells, “Fist Bump!”
Three passers-by think, “Oh, I heard about this. Fist Bump a Ginger Day. I trust the internet.”
Within 5 minutes, there’s a Flash-mob of strangers surrounding you, Channel 2 Action News shows up with a satellite van, the story gets picked up in China because for some reason THAT’s not censored, and a bunch of Chinese teenagers dye their hair red in the school bathroom and practice pronouncing “Fist Bump” in a Southern-American accent.
Within 10 minutes, 5 out of 6 continents are on board (and yes, we’re counting Eurasia as one continent because nooooobody wanted to invite Germany, so we needed some extra data points to get a fair average.)
And the guy who tweeted it in the first place doesn’t even remember because actually it wasn’t him, it was his girlfriend’s bratty kid who thought it would be funny to hack the new guy’s Twitter account and post something stupid, and the kid has a brief feeling of dejavu a year later when he sees a fist-bump-a-ginger mob scene, but he can’t quite remember why it feels so familiar.
And that, logically, is the way National Whatever Days get started.
So, I was thinking, why don’t we go ahead and create our own National Whatever Day?
Here are a couple of other ideas:
- National “Grudgingly Buy Gifts for Distant Acquaintances” Day: (Like Christmas, but without the pretense of meaning.)
- National “Narrate a Stranger’s Life” Day: (Pop out from behind an office plant, whisper, “Our hero emerges from his cubicle unscathed.” Disappear. Find new hiding place. Repeat.)
- National “BE The People of Walmart” Day: (Self-explanatory.)
I’ve put up a poll and I will be deleting my cookies to vote multiple times for my favorite, so I suggest you do the same.
Got a good one? Leave a comment and I might add it to my poll.