I’ve finally decided to learn Vim, which is kind of like saying:
“I’ve decided to learn to fly. Watch closely as I dive from the edge of a high-rise building into a hungry bowl of sharks.”
The first obstacle is “How do I even open Vim?” Because, apparently, Vim is too good for double-clicking, which is fine, but then…why do you need an Icon?
Luckily my wild guess of
on the command line worked.
Now that is a super-helpful start page.
Looking closely, I see this:
Quick Help: <F1>:help -:go up dir D:delete R:rename s:sort-by x:exec
Ah, that’s good. Press F1 for help.
Whamp!!! (that’s the Mac sound for “Wrong button, dumb-ass.”)
Okay….let’s try typing
(Bracing self for Whamp sound…) Aha! No whamp!! Making progress.
Dear Lord, what am I looking at?
Move around: Use the cursor keys, or “h” to go left,
“j” to go down, “k” to go up, “l” to go right.
Okay, let’s try “j” to go down.
What the?! Oh, my fingers are in the wrong place. Why would the keys be “hjkl” instead of “jkl;”? This is not what Mavis Beacon taught me to do!
Okay, let’s see…
|tutor| 30 minutes training course for beginners
Oh, great! A tutorial! Not sure why I had to know basic Vim commands to get to it, but at least I’m here. Typing:
:grep |tutor| (silence)
:cat |tutor| (silence)
:dog |tutor| (silence)
:ostrich |tutor| (silence)
Really Vim? Really?
Okay…let me check that Vim book a friend recommended:
“This book will teach you everything you need to know about Vim…assuming you have already been through Vim Tutor.”
Holds computer above head, prepares to heave it through nearest window…
And then, salvation! I spot a tiny link at the bottom of the page, which takes me to a VimTutor help page. (Yes, there is a Help page for their Help page).
For OpenVMS, if Vim has been properly installed, you can start vimtutor from a VMS prompt with: @VIM:vimtutor
I see. I’m supposed to type “@VIM:vimtutor”.
Because, yes…that is so intuitive.
Thank you, Vim. I have officially been hazed.